Saturday, 28 January 2012

Stop Abusing Facebook

You know what annoys me? Signing into facebook and being over-loaded by stupid statuses and pictures. Especially the pictures. When did the trend of posting what your food looks like start up? One guy I know posted a picture of his Burger King meal. Yeah, we get it, you managed to spend £3 on a burger, chips and coke. Stop showing off. Has the recession gotten so bad that the only thing we have left to flaunt is the fact we can still afford food?
And all those statuses about how you 'luv my bby 4eva'. For goodness sake you've been going out less than a month, get a grip. You only know her last name because of facebook.
Then there's the idiots who commemorate 'deep and meaningful moments' with tattoos, then proceed to block up my timeline with their unoriginal, nonsensical crap.
And stop begging for comments/likes! You know who you are! There's not 15 likes on that photo because of your face, it's because you're showing more cleavage than a stripper on a Friday.  If you really want to see what people think of you stop taking whorish photos and accept the fact that no 25 year old man likes your 16 year old photo because you're smart/funny/in possession of a great personality. It's the boobs. It was always the boobs. Move on, grow up and buy some decent clothing.

They're the only reason you have over 50 friends.

The Trials of Being a Woman

You know who automatically gets dealt the short straw in life? Women. Watch, I can list 3 reasons for this off the top of my head and I’m not even technically a woman yet (girl for 4 more days, before you get sex change ideas)
1.      1.  Children. Let’s ignore childbirth and the horrifying effects pregnancy has on your body. This part is actually about being a parent. As a woman you’re automatically the one who has to look after the kids, how often does daddy give up his job? And if you do work you’re still expected to clean the house, make the lunches and pet the children…or whatever you do with kids. Think, if a child comes to school dirty who do the blame? Yep, the mother. We’re expected to be able to juggle the work, home and parent life perfectly while our husband opens a beer and watches sports. If he’s around. Who leaves their children most of the time? The men. These ‘weekend fathers’ get to live their week single and free and just accept the responsibility of their offspring on a weekend. Sometimes, only every second weekend. Or once a month. Or not at all. This is completely socially acceptable, but if a woman does it she’s heartless.
2.     2.   Men. Unless you’re lucky enough to be a lesbian you have to deal with this breed of ‘human’. It’s infuriating. They claim to be so simplistic, saying women are the complicated neurotic ones who are impossible to please. That’s so untrue it’s unreal. All men I know have a needy, emotional, stroppy side to them. In fact they whine more than my girl friends. *cry cry* my girlfriend talked to another guy, she obviously wants to blow his brains out *cry cry* SHUT UP!
3.     3.   Attractive or smart. Generally if you wear short little skirts and have a good rack you’re presumed to have the mental capacity of an orange. No matter how hard the woman tries to prove her intelligence her looks will hold her back from the respect she deserves and would receive if she had a penis. The thing is, men subconsciously, or openly depending how outdated his values are, have a block on beautiful women’s brains. They just don’t believe in them. They’re too busy staring at their chests and fantasizing about what’s underneath. Yet a good looking man is given a chance to prove himself before he’s labeled an idiot. 

Saturday, 21 January 2012

Put Some Clothes On

I'm sick to my back teeth (odd expression) of seeing girls walking around half naked, like they should be proud of the fact they have enough IQ points to grow breasts. There's a time and a place and it's not the middle of the day walking around in the rain.
You know who I blame? Rihanna. Most papers print photos of her just because she's wearing something slutty. That shouldn't be how it works. You shouldn't be able to get into a national newspaper for wearing short shorts. It's ridiculous.

She's just checking she's still a girl
Now, don't get me wrong, it's fun to wear less sometimes. But those times are well defined: summer, when abroad, after 9pm. Not walking to Asda, not hanging outside of corner shops and certainly not during times you could see someone you know.

Thursday, 19 January 2012


Spring is right around the corner and I cannot wait! Yes, in only 13 days it will be Spring, probably the best of the seasons. Even the word Spring is lovely, it makes you feel energetic and happy. Like you could run through the fields in a breezy skirt like Maria from The Sound Of Music.

"The daffodils have started growing!"
Now there's a slight technical issue with Spring in England, they don't think it starts until some random date in March. However, having been raised in Ireland, a country that's in touch with the earth, I know that Spring really begins on February first. It's something to do with farming and the lambs. Also, it makes more sense for a new season to begin on the first of a month rather than randomly stumbling into it during the month. An added benefit to knowing the real start of Spring is that it just so happens to be my birthday, so it's lovely to think I was born just as everything starts to brighten up.
So now you know the truth about Spring and no longer have to worry about waking up in a new season halfway through March. Because I know that kept you up at night.

Thursday, 12 January 2012

It's All Over

Don't be alarmed about the post title, I'm talking about exams. I had them all yesterday and besides from an impending sense of doom over my results I'm fairly calm. I just need to do my English coursework now and I'll be free from everything...until May.
It's so lovely when horrible things come to an end, last night was the first time in a month when I could sit down without feeling guilty for watching the TV instead of revising. But enough of this talk!

Here's a thought that popped into my head the other day while I was in the bath (the bath part ties into the story, I'm not just trying to add sex appeal).
I was in the bath, as I mentioned before, and had just washed my hair, so I turned on the shower head to rinse the bath water off and gave my head a blast of cold water because I'd once read it's good for your hair. I can't remember why exactly, something about making it shinier or stimulating the roots, but then it hit me how ridiculous it was that I was putting my poor head through that for a benefit I couldn't even remember. Then I thought even more about this 'benefit' I was meant to get from cold water on my head and realised it was a load of bull and that I was a fool for believing it.
All this may just seem like a funny story about how I'm quite gullible and believe anything written in a glossy magazine, but actually the point is how many things do we believe just because they're in print?
The answer is, unsurprisingly, a lot. From make believe science about 'magic yogurts' to 'the science of haircare' if it has people in white coats we tend believe the 'study'. We all do it, there's no point in denying it or claiming you just drink Actimel because you 'like the taste', we all have parts of us that wants to believe that the skin cream we just bought really will leave our skin as smooth as a baby's bottom rather than accept the truth, that it's all a ploy to get us to buy.
So, think twice next time you go to buy the latest miracle product and remember; cold water does nothing to your hair.

Thursday, 5 January 2012

The Stress of EVERYTHING!

We live in a world where we no longer go through periods of stress, but rather short periods without stress. Stress is a constant in our day to day lives, we never get away from work because, even when at home, the office is sat right there in the form of your mobile phone.
Now some people would think "Well, she's just a student, what does she know about stress?" Blooming loads! I have exams in 6 days...6 days! No matter how much I study I still feel stupid and like I'll fail and end up living in a box.
In saying that, I'm using my free time to write to a blog instead of studying so maybe I have a point after all.
I also use Gmail, which is stress enough. It's poorly laid out with buttons here there and everywhere and no logical order. Every e-mail I want to reply to takes a 5 minute game of 'find the button'. It's like a computer vomited on the screen after a website binge.
Stress follows you, it never clocks off, it never takes a break and worse of all it creeps into your mind just when you're at your most peaceful. Stress sees when your most vulnerable and attacks. Stress surrounds you. And it will never go away.
Unless you move to desert island. I wouldn't imagine there's too much stress involved in getting coconuts from a tree.

Tuesday, 3 January 2012

The Shiny New Year

Greetings! Welcome to my first blog post of 2012, it's looking good so far right?
So today is my first day back at college, I have exams next week (help!) and the weather is abysmal! I've had the worst walk to college ever this morning, it was seriously throwing it down. The word raindrops suggests something gentle, but goodness, this was like rainbuckets. I actually found the whole thing quite funny for some reason and was walking along chuckling to myself whilst clutching the hood of my coat.
I don't have any new years resolutions, I already eat well and exercise regularly, I'm doing okay for studying and learning to drive and everything else seems to be ticking along nicely. I guess my resolution would be to keep on this path!
Okay, well I'll leave it at this. I know it hasn't been a particularly exciting post, but everyone feels a bit lazy on their first day back!